No matter what he says or how long or in how many ways he resists, the wife is to persist with her seduction: “I know it’s silly, but come join me anyway,” she says; or, “I know you’re starving, but come join me for a while anyway”; or, “Yes, it cost a few dollars, but come join me for a while and you’ll see it was worth it”; or, “You think I look idiotic? Come join me and you’ll see how truly idiotic I can look!” Repeat these phrases as many times as needed, until the husband surrenders.
For extremely difficult cases, the wife may need to do something more physical. She may, for instance, have some champagne (or his favorite other drink) ready and can try to loosen him up with that. She may offer a massage for his tired shoulders. She may perform a belly dance or striptease. Or, she may crawl up to him on her knees, unzip his pants, and take a hands-on approach to seduction. Each case will be different, and in each case the wife must rely on her own understanding of what her husband’s particular weakness is. If he’s obsessed with the stock market, she may suddenly show miraculous knowledge of that day’s activity. If he loves baseball, she may suddenly reverse her usual aversion to it, don a baseball cap, and begin a conversation about that day’s game, the statistics of the opposing pitchers, the need for a new manager, and so on.
*26/196/1*
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